Cautious Courage

“You can’t test courage cautiously.” Annie Dillard

Not many of us consider ourselves brave even when we have fought and won some measure of success. If you have seen Spielberg and Hanks’ mini-series, Band of Brothers, you will remember the interview with Easy Company’s Richard Winters. When asked if he was a hero, he replied, “No, but I was in a company of heroes.”

Last semester my VIU philosophy professor led a discussion on the topic of barriers. He defined them as reasons why we don’t do whatever it is that is in front of us. For example, 100 years ago few women pursued a degree in medicine. It wasn’t considered an option and institutions hadn’t thought to be accommodating, families held such ideas with a dim view, costs were prohibitive and so the barriers loomed large. We all know a little about barriers, or at least our perception of them.

Maybe you have heard of Regent College. It is a graduate school on UBC’s campus in Vancouver and they have a unique approach to education; one that resonates deeply within me. “Regent College cultivates intelligent, vigorous, and joyful commitment to Jesus Christ, His church, and His world… Our mission to think Christianly should be seen as part of a more comprehensive task involving the transformation and integration of our whole lives – mind, heart and will…My prayer for you is that in coming to Regent you will be edified and as a result you will be able to edify others.” Paul S. Williams, Academic Dean.

My desire to be a part of the Regent community has grown considerably over these 10 years and so have the barriers. Cost, distance, lack of formal education, support and fear of failure stood in the way. That is until last summer. There was a compelling push to trust God for the desires of my heart and I launched my application fully expecting to be declined. To my amazement, the application was accepted and my first on-campus course is behind me.

In talking with several other students on the weekend, I discovered that they have had to overcome significant barriers to be at Regent. For many of my colleagues English is a second language, for others, the implications of a move to Vancouver from another country with a family and no other source of income is scary. For another, who volunteers in camp ministry, the level of writing required to pass graduate level work feels equal to the expectation that she will run a marathon with no previous training.

I am in awe of these, my new friends, and hope their level of courage rubs off on me. Until then, I secretly applaud my little effort and call it cautious.