I’m not sure what’s happening in your circle of friends this winter but it seems there are more losses than usual in mine. Not that I have known many of them well, but enough to speak their children’s names in prayer and to rest assured that they are at peace and free of the process that eventually took them.
Most of the dear ones I refer to were people who knew and loved God, who did not fear being dead when it came to that, but who were uncertain about the process of dying. It’s perfectly natural to feel that way. Afterall, no one has undertaken the process beforehand and who knows how things are going to go. It seems to me that no matter how long the illness lingers there is still a sense of suddenness for the ones left behind, but that’s another topic altogether.
A few years ago I lost my best friend to breast cancer. She died on January 28, 2004. The after-Christmas lull and grey weather remind me of her last days and the helpless feeling that I could do nothing to prevent her from slipping away. I could hardly imagine how I would ever say good-bye but during that January, seeing her suffer so helped me let go. It’s a strange process and there is still much I do not understand but my faith in God’s goodness has returned and it feels like the grieving process has been a long but healthy one.
I have no doubt that the losses we experience draw us closer to God if we let them. There is wisdom in the process and another reminder of our own mortality. And that’s a good thing because it seems that people die the way they live, for the most part. When I worked on the palliative care ward as a Hospice volunteer I was amazed at the consistency in that. People who struggled in life, struggled in death. The ones who led peaceful and gracious lives also died that way. Not that I want to dwell in the shadows of imminent death but it makes sense to take some time to consider how I want to live…and die, as much as it is up to me.
There are two quotes that inspire me.
“The heart of the wise is in the house of mourning.” Ecclesiastes 7:4
“Precious in the sight of the Lord is is the death of his saints.” Psalm 116:15
That’s us, by the way.
If you are experiencing loss, please accept my most sincere condolences. May you know the peace and comfort of God and community in your time of sadness.
Thanks for sharing that Sandi that was beautiful. I miss Sharon too. And you are so right she did die as she lived. She is missed. I too will raise her children’s names in my prayers as you have done. What an awesome remembrance of her.
Sandi, your words are so precious. I have just lost a dear and wonderful friend who passed away on Dec. 28th, after a courageous battle. She was such an inspiration to many as she lived so she died, praising the Lord for his goodness and unfailing love.
The Lord is truly our Rock and Fortress.
Blessings
Hi Sharon,
I am so sorry for your loss. It is a difficult time and especially around the holidays. Yes, the Lord is ever present, still sovereign and His wonderful grace is enough, even for our grief. May He bless you in this time of reflection as He covers you with His wings of love.
Jeanne, thank you for your love and comments. Wasn’t it a great honour to know her? I can’t imagine what my life would have been like without her. I imagine her smiling on us and at perfect peace – and she probably has the place in hysterics!