I once had someone say to me, “You’re not a machine, you know.”
Hmmm, did it seem like I thought I was?
Her reference was to the pace I kept; late to bed, early to rise, 15 minute gaps between ‘events’ in order to allow for travel time. The amount I accomplished was stunning, really. But the price was high.
It started with a phone call. I remember talking to another mom whose kids were just a little older than mine. By 9:00 am the house cleaning, clothes-washing, cookie-baking was behind her and her children were on their way to school. As I stood there in my pajamas in my kitchen, rubbing sleepy eyes, I determined the need to be more productive. Clearly.
The past 30 + years have been that.
Now, however, my body doth protest and it protesteth much these days.
Suddenly the word ‘rest’ and all it promises finds a place on my bucket list. Even preempting Paris. Is this new development a result of age? That probably has something to do with it. Increasing join pain is wearing me out. So is the travel, not to mention long hours in meetings, unfamiliar beds and the joyous and stimulating work of learning.
Lest you think I complain (God forbid), I’m told that excessive busyness and resulting stress leads to negativity, loss of perspective, and overwhelming discouragement. Rich ground for vulnerability and a loss of bearing.
Maybe you are one of the lucky ones, whose body, mind, soul and strength are Olympian. I marvel at your machinery. As for me, I am a flower.
St. Paul’s words to church in 1st century Macedonia surround my weary mind like a warm bath.
“Pray that our God will make you fit for what he’s called you to be, pray that he’ll fill your good ideas and acts of faith with his own energy so that it all amounts to someting. If your life honours the name of Jesus, he will honour you. Grace is behind and through all of this!” II Thessalonians 1.
I like the words of this Danish Proverb. “Don’t sail out further than you can row back.”
Dear God, make me fit to fulfill your call for me with your own energy, keeping in mind that my strength is small. All I want is to honour you. Thank you for grace upon grace as I rest in you.
