“We are trying to be several selves at once, without all our selves being organized by a single, mastering Life within us.” Thomas Kelly, Testament of Devotion
Committee work is something I enjoy especially when its purpose is well-defined and its members embrace their task with enthusiasm and skill. Reaching the prescribed outcome is celebratory, to be sure. One key precursor to success is having a strong chairperson who knows how to facilitate respectfully and knowledgably. Without skilled leadership and the willingness of all members to take direction, listen and move forward in a unified but distinct manner, the outcome is less assured.
I wonder, at times, if I am a committee of selves without a strong sense of direction because I am unclear on what my mandate is or whose influence I ought to give prominence to.
I wonder how many things I say yes to and when my calendar is filled to capacity regret all the things I would like to say yes to but haven’t the time or the energy for, all because I am unsure of my purpose.
I wonder if the warring factions within me would accede to the rule of a benevolent and capable Commander-in-Chief if I really trusted His goodness and that He has my best interest in mind.
These dissonant behaviours leave me feeling scattered and unsettled.
Jesus puts in another way: “Just as the branch cannot bear any fruit unless it shar
es the life of the vine, so you can produce nothing unless you go on growing in me. I am the vine itself, you are the branches.” John 15:4-5
“Our resistance of God is the root of our peacelessness.” D. Johnson
